Vote for Jonathan!

I’ve been nominated for a comedy award! If you like me be sure to click here, and check the box beside my name. It’s that easy.

Thanks for your support, and may all your dreams come true… except the one about the monster that lives in your linen closet.



The facts according to Jonathan:

“Long John Silver’s is the shelter for battered fish.”


December Public Shows:

Clown Cabaret


Clown Cabaret in Washington DC

Monday, December 12, 2011 at 8pm

Tickets: $10

The Shop at Fort Fringe

607 New York Ave, NW, Washington, DC

Features 8 other clowns from around the DC Area, and yes we will be carpooling in my Smart Car.

3-2-1 Lancaster


3-2-1 Lancaster: Lancaster PA New Year’s Eve Celebration

Saturday, December 31, 2011

Tickets: $10 in Advance / $12 day of Event

I’ll be performing at the Clipper Magazine Stadium at 6pm & 8pm

Events throughout the evening at the YMCA & Clipper Magazine Stadium


Happy Holidays Everyone!

Seriously… all of them… even April Fools Day and Daylight Savings time.

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My life in bullet points…

My last update was in July, so lots to fill you in on… Join me, won’t you?

  • Back in July and August my wife and I were still on our cross continent excursion/tour. It was great to spent the whole summer together and we had an awesome time as I performed across the US & Canada. Check out our blog at to read about our camping attempt, lost luggage, and our run in with “the law”.

Click to check out some photos from the road!

  • After I dropped Lauren off at home I got to sleep in my own bed for about 6 hours, and then I caught a plane to Edmonton, AB for the Edmonton Fringe Festival. It’s the 2nd largest festival of its kind in the world. I did a bunch of shows, got to see a bunch of friends, took in a few shows, and even bumped into Zach Galifianakis.
  • In September I performed at the Maryland Renaissance Festival. This was my first time pulling on stripped tights and a puffy shirt. I had a blast! The crowds were great, all of your food comes on a stick, and even the King & Queen came to see my performance. Huzzah. Hopefully I’ll be back again next year! (Photos Below)

Maryland Renaissance Festival 2011

  • In October I was invited to showcase my act for 1000’s of college kids at the NACA Mid Atlantic Conference in Buffalo, NY. Later this month I’m showcasing at the NACA Northeast in Hartford, CT, and I just found out I was selected to perform at NACA Nationals this Spring! With all these college visits someone has give me a honorary doctorate right? Dr. Jonathan Burns has a nice ring to it.

Check in with my College Agent Fresh Variety for more details.


The Facts according to Jonathan: “A 2 person flash mob is just called dancing.”



November 3, 2011 at 9pm

Richmond ComedySportz

8906-H West Broad Street, Richmond, VA 23294

Tickets $5 at the box office. Call 804-266-9377 for Reservations

More Public Shows coming in December!


Coming Soon…

  • New Website.
  • Thanksgiving.
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Back from the Future!

I’m back from the World Buskers Festival in Christchurch, NZ. I had a blast! A brief recap…

  1. Performed on the National NZ News (Click Video Below).
  2. Saw where Frodo lives (See the “Lord of the Rings” Trilogy).
  3. Performed for 1000s of people (See photo above & Click for more pictures).
  4. I got to live February 1st twice because of my flights and the time difference. One day off from re-living Ground Hog Day (See “Ground Hog Day” Starring Bill Murray – Even if you have seen it before).

Advice to live by: “If you flip your air hockey table upside down, you get a hovercraft.”

Upcoming Public Shows:

Manhattan Magic in the heart of New York City

Friday, February 25, 2011
Times Square Arts Center, 669 8th Ave., New York, NY (Between 42nd and 43rd St.)
Strolling Magic at 6:30pm, Show at 7pm


Tilted Torch: But Wait! There’s More!

Friday, March 4, 2011
Red Palace, 1212 H Street NE, Washington, DC
Doors 9:00 pm, Show 10:00 pm, $10 adv, $15 door


I’ve been selected to showcase at the NACA MidAtlantic Festival SHOWCASE on March 11 & 12. I will be seen by dozens of Colleges & Universities from the East Coast. Hopefully they like me and bring me to their school!

More Details:

Coming Soon…

  • More Live Dates
  • Spring Adventures in Los Angeles, Las Vegas, and Other Spanish sounding towns
  • My braces are coming off!

Read the December Mailing –

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